I have a backlog of things to post, but I came across this little image, and had to comment which lead me to continue on to my view of poly.
As I do my blogs, this is free thinking, and me trying to figure it out. It does not necessarily make a stand* but offers ideas. This is especially true since this is a work in progress that was posted early.
Interesting way to put it…. Open, closed….. whatever.
http://www.obsidianfields.com/lj/nonmonogamy2.5.gif by xeromag.com
As for my view of polyamory:
I have an interesting view of polyamorous… while not intimate, the common person may understand…. girls night out, cooking club, or the guys weekly golf/poker/basketball game.
Just like polyamory, your intimate relationship may not work out if you are limited in this important aspect of your life.
Just like many’s view of poly, many are jealous of these friends as if intimate. (not sure if that justifies polyamory, a special relationship with friends, cutting out everything but your partner, or god forbid…. makes them intimate and affecting the intimate and thus polyamory)
What’s better? Satisfy your partners needs… who’s–the jealous one’s or the one that needs there own space? Will it lead to more, and who pushed it along. Will the fact of being around these others who affect your intimate relationship allow you to keep faithful in your intimate relationship, or will it lead to “cheating”. Is it the Jealousy (or thoughts, and possibly accusations, of cheating) that leads to the cheating–if there ever was?
NOTE: (I suppose this note should also be its own post–perhaps that will come soon)…I have made the argument that if your needs are not met, you should move on. What, when, and how much should you sacrifice? Religion says one thing, but many kids have said that breaking up before the kids are “out of the house” is the preferred choice. While both choices are hard, if done right moving on earlier is better. All can agree that trying to make it work is the first choice and step, but forcing it to work is just as bad and fighting during a breakup. Both take discipline, and couples that fight during breakup are the worst. The question is what’s right for a particular couple. Who knows if you’ll fight more together, apart, or both. Can they move on while the children are still dependents. If they are able to do a no contest, they can probably hack it, and should move on before they resent each other to the point that they can’t. If they can’t separate no-contest, they probably can’t get along together either and are harming the kids either way.
*My stand is that I am open minded and ok to at least think about it. I am not “poly” but with my Aspergers, many say that poly works well because of my specific quirks. — more on that later…. another post to come.
NOTE: thats polyamory not polygamy
